Human behavior

I just dont get humans very well.There is one theme that comes over and over through my life.
Human's lie and then expect me to respond to their truth.I just don't get it.Dogs don't lie.Unless taught to by humans.
A example.There is a dress code at the club...but no one sez anything about it to me.Six months later,I get in trouble for breaking the code for six months.Had someone of said something the six months of wrong dressing or build up of resentment would not occur.Fat women hate me.I shouldn't wear short shirts... tight pants..
A year ago, I offered a pup to my friend Rowan who had said for years she wanted that kind.So when I offered it, she was free to say no, it was a bad time,that she DIDN'T REALLY want the pup, just wanted to talk about it.I would of understood.Instead, she sez yes and for four months, I am subjected to silence from her stupid boyfriend who said nothing.Like I forced the pup on them.I was told by Rowan that I should just let him be... As if twenty one years of being punished by Colin for dogs wasn't enough.Before this the guy would talk to me, called me hot (as if I should be impressed with myself because he thinks I am hot).So I get punished because this guy cant tell Rowen he didn't want the dog.How stupid.What a coward.So I get blamed,
I wish people wouldn't lie.I wish I understood them as well as dogs.It is awful to have to deal with people who lie about their lives and then blame it on others.
After calling the chief four times about the plowing next land over through the grinding areas,I realize he is lieing to himself and me.He isn't going to do what he said and he is mad I remind him of that.
Humans are weird and I am feeling more comfortable with dogs.

POLLYWOGIGNG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH HOW I LOVE POLLYWOGS.I DEEPLY missed them last year so I took a container, went to the local mud pond and saved a bunch.The pond always dries before they hatch to frogs so I am dancing the pollywog dance..... ye yea yes....OH HOW I LOVE POLLYWOGS.Some are big and some are small.All are BEAUUTIFUL.... EW SO BEAUTIFUL.

Dealing with Death

I feel like a rollie pollie and want to curl up and hide my soft side.Only expose the hard protected side.But now that I write it, it is already gone... My momma is on her way out.The oxygen isnt helping her now.Emotions are running as high and full as the river.You could drown if you get in to deep.Keeping communications open.what really matters anyway....

sleepy face comfort girl

ah what a nice weekend.I am tired to my bones.Working dogs until 1 am,got home at 2 am... Yawn big time.I so love my home and my dog friends.Meanning Oberon,Razzle,Leda. I feel cozy.Like I have flannel pajamas on in my emotions.......soft,content.

mixed emotions

Lots of them.I went to the docs today about my spine and my lumbar 5 and sacrum 1 disk is gone.Blown out.WWWAAAAAAAAAA I want to crawl up in someones lap and cry.Isnt that a nnew feeling I ask and am then distracted by the injury fact.lol.... Imagine crawling in someones lap as if that would change a damn thing...Funny how we..maybe just me... seek comfort outside of ourselves...
But yes, this is a serious injury and its changed my life.
ok.. other thing on my mind today... this idea of intimacy... and married men and casual sex and how there is this rampant reasoning that in order to have good sex one must have intimacy... or that casual sex cant be intimate...what a silly joke.I am intimate with my dogs,my favorite places of comfort,but I am not sexual with these things.critters.. so I for one what to bomb this stupid thought process.I felt intimate with my pollywog's.I cared deeply about them.What a weird world we swim through huh?
L5/S1.... hum... gotta see that healed.

a phoenix rose today

I had finished tracking Bead Woman and had put her away,let the boys out and was just getting into my car when it rose.A huge black bird with red wing tips.It was bigger then a hawk,or a turkey vulture(peace eagle).It came out from the earth directly from the end of the track we had run and as I jumped from my car, it disappeared.completely.
A hour earlier Peter had told me Bella was gone.Bella taught me to track.She taught me more about scent then anyone I know.I honor her today.She was one of my best friends.

midnight view

its 3 am and I am awake due to pain in my hip... There are not many things in my life I wish I could do over...but lifting that hutch is certainly one of them....This has been the worst injury of my life and I sense that it is going to be with me for a long time.Forever according to Itamar.What a sentence.. forever.After being married forever...I have learned forever isnt nearly as long as I had originally thought...lol...