Picture Perfect Postcard

Sometimes I think my life is one big postcard with views that leave me inspired and awed by the beauty,the greatness, the pain of growth.
My life in CARDA is over and I am no longer a member.It feels like hundreds, thousands of pounds were lifted from my shoulders,my heart.I feel like I have my life back.I no longer must focus on the dead and possibly dieing.My focus of "what if " is over.It has taken me a long time of working through loosing Lilly and not finding her or bringing Rachael closure.However, the universe provides as I did find her daughter.Her older one she has never held,met or looked into her eyes.The one taken immediately at birth.But...One day before her 41 birthday..Connection!.Now Rachael has a daughter, and a grandson/granddaughter.Blessed be.I feel so full.
The beauty around me has leaked into my life and I am green in spring planting my fruit trees and cleaning my land.I walk in beauty everywhere.
I miss my moon and tonight I washed my face with a moon rag and could smell my blood and I sank my face in deep sniffing her.She and I were together four months short of forty one years.WOW... She was such a awesome friend and I am so very grateful for the things she brought me. I have missed three cycles today.I feel so deeply humbled.